The Beginning

The alarm rang, piercing the cool morning air. It was 4am, far to early for anything real to happen. That buzz killed me, reminded me that the rest was over, this day had to start. I rolled quickly to the foot of my bed, unplugging the glowing noise box on the other end of the room. I had been awake all night, resting the body but not the mind. Slowly I eased back into bed, propped my pillows up against the wall trying to get a last moment of comfort in. A last moment of relaxation before this day, the room had never felt so silent. Sitting in the dark I couldn’t think, there was no reason to. The fear of what was about to happen numbed me, it gripped my soul. I leaned over to my bedside table grabbing my silver grinder and that familiar bong. I grabbed a pinch of sativa and loaded the bowl like I had on so many other mornings. My nerves shot, hands shaking; today it was out of necessity, not some cheap thrill like usual.

I flicked my Zippo, gently caressing the herb with the low flame. Breathe; breathe that familiar smoke into those lungs. I sat, holding the cloud in. This was my moment, ten seconds of serenity before the world would start again. Exhaling, the thin smoke danced in the warm light that shone through the window. It seemed to hang in the air, effortlessly motionless.  It hovered over the mess of a room, that pathetic studio box I’d lived in for too long.

The floor was covered with the essentials for adventure, for survival. I guess packing wasn’t a priority to me, its best left to the last minute. The things I would need were all there, they just needed to be stuffed into that big blue pack. Clothes, blankets, camping equipment; everything a man would need to survive in this world. Necessities of a life without walls, a life without the comforts we come to know and love. All of this sat in front of me, it didn’t matter, I couldn’t fathom everything that was about to happen.

Two more pulls, inhaling the sweet nectar that put my mind at ease. The room hazier still, it was time to get up, time for all this shit to begin. Sliding my feet to the floor I turned on the light illuminating that tiny space. It was nothing more than a patch of carpet and a miniature kitchen, a bargain in Los Angeles. A bargain, the cost of living had kept me just above the line of poverty for the last six months. It was home, my empty stale home, the hole that trapped me each night I came home and locked the door.  I was ready to escape, leave this town that killed any possibility of living. A Life trapped by work, bills, and this metropolis in the desert. A town that tried to kill anything wild, anything free; this unbearable town killed any chance of living.

My plan was simple, fill that backpack and leave by any means necessary. No money and no plans, all I had was a destination and a deadline. I had no real reason to leave, it just felt right. I had eight days, eight days to get to D.C. A destination, that’s all I needed to spark this adventure. My friend Dell, my childhood friend from that country town in Washington State, was attending some conference to stop intolerance. They were trying to save child-soldiers in Africa, a bunch of privileged children throwing their dollars from the comfort of this continent to “save” these kids. A reason to put a little warmth in their hearts, to self satisfy their lust for good; it was really just a donation to pad the salaries of some non-profit leaders.  It didn’t matter to me either way, I could have been preventing child-soldiers, or ending sodomy in the Vatican, I just needed a reason to get out of the palm lined streets of Brentwood.

It had been a year of working my ass off to pay rent, to feed my parents expectations of an ideal child, I guess they were my expectations as well. A full-time life, school and work; I’d had it with this going nowhere. Somehow I had managed to afford a one way ticket back, motivation; I would have to get there. I knew with a full backpack and a big smile I could hitch my way across this country like so many before me had. My soul was aching for adventure; I needed to taste that freedom that I had become so accustomed to during my childhood in the mountains. This is how you set your soul free, by replacing everything you know and getting spit out the other end, hopefully alive…